Call NATO, scramble the Blue Angels and get the Justice League on the horn.
Actually, don’t call NATO. It's next to worthless in a rush, and we need decisive, scorched earth action if we’re going to bring down the monster the University of Maryland just unleashed on the world.
The Terrapins posted their new, team intro video to Facebook on Friday, pumping up fans with football highlights, eye-pummeling uniforms and an AC/DC soundtrack.
It’s your run-of-the-mill, college football hype video—except for the overly vascular reptile smashing stones and leering deeply into your soul.
That’s Testudo—the Terrapins’ trusty mascot—who appears to have dedicated himself to a heavy schedule of weightlifting and turtle-enhancing drugs since last fall.
Testudo is no longer messing around. He might not even be a mascot anymore, as he looks primed to climb out of the briny deep and destroy a seaside village.
Just so we're clear, this is what Testudo looked like in 2013:
Now the turtle has teeth. We are all dead.
You can’t protect your house against a bipedal turtle with fangs and moisture-wicking technology. It’s just not possible.
Big Ten beware. The Terrapins are now Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles with a decidedly malevolent bend.
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The Alabama Crimson Tide may have somewhat of a quarterback dilemma.
No, we’re not talking about the up-and-down play of current starter Blake Sims in Week 1. Instead, it’s the prospect of a current JUCO quarterback coming to town, per his Twitter (H/t College Football Talk), which has since been deleted:
If you recall, Chad Kelly was a 4-star recruit out of Buffalo, New York, and was listed as the No. 5 dual-threat quarterback in the nation. After backing up Tajh Boyd at Clemson, the 6'3", 205-pounder is currently putting up video game numbers at top-ranked JUCO school East Mississippi.
Since the Tweet has since been deleted, one has to wonder whether he will still be making the trip. But regardless, no matter how talented Kelly may be, there really is no need for him at Tuscaloosa.
There was absolutely no reason for Kelly not to be a serious contender to start for Clemson this season.
Unfortunately, things didn’t quite go his way during the spring. But instead of working through the issues, Kelly chose to lash out at the coaching staff. That includes an incident where he had to be escorted off the field by Clemson police.
It didn’t take long for head coach Dabo Swinney to declare enough was enough, as he soon after announced Kelly’s dismissal from the team, via a released statement:
I have dismissed Chad Kelly for conduct detrimental to our program. He has had a pattern of behavior that is not consistent with the values of our program. I hope he will mature and grow from this and become the man and player I know he can be. I wish him nothing but the best in the future academically and athletically.
Nick Saban runs a pretty tight ship at Alabama.
Kelly had an issue sitting on the bench during a spring game. Do you think his attitude will be any better when he’s sitting on the sidelines for a year or more?
It’s a distraction the team doesn’t need.
Too Crowded at the Top
The Tide could field a baseball team with the quarterbacks on their depth chart.
Well, not really. But saying the team has plenty of options under center is an understatement
While Sims would be gone if Kelly were to arrive in 2015, Jacob Coker looks like a safe bet to be the front-runner for the job next season. A 3-star recruit out of Mobile, Alabama, Coker backed up Jameis Winston at Florida State last season. He has shown potential thus far in spring practices, per NFL.com's Mike Huguenin.
Then of course you need to consider Alabama’s crop of young guns at the position.
From the 2013 class, there’s hope that 4-star Cooper Bateman and 3-star Alec Morris can develop into talented quarterbacks. After redshirting in 2013, Bateman will only be a sophomore come next season.
David Cornwell is the only quarterback from the 2014 class. A 4-star prospect out of Norman, Oklahoma, the 6'5", 241-pounder was ranked as the No. 4 quarterback in the country.
Finally, there’s 5-star commit Blake Barnett from the 2015 class. The No. 1-ranked dual-threat quarterback in the country—and No. 17-ranked prospect—Barnett should make a strong push for playing time. He was also named the Elite 11 MBP:
There’s just too much talent already on the Tide to bring on Kelly.
All recruiting information and rankings used in this article are courtesy of 247Sports.
For complete coverage and everything college football, you can reach Sebastian on Twitter and via email at Sebastian.LenaBR@gmail.com.
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During Week 1, the Wisconsin football team held a 24-7 lead early in the third quarter. From that point, the Badgers totally fell apart, going on to lose 28-24 after untimely injuries coupled with hyper-conservative turned hyper-aggressive play-calling led to their demise.
With a brand-new quarterback, new receivers on the outside and a pair of new tight ends, the Badgers passing offense sputtered badly. Technically, Melvin Gordon wasn't a starter last season, but he played as much as anyone and thus wasn't included in this. Furthermore, both Dan Voltz and Dallas Lewallen started numerous games last season and weren't included in here either.
On defense, the Badgers looked really good for the first 35 or so minutes, save one first-half blown coverage, which led to an 80-yard pass. The Badgers are breaking in a brand-new front seven to go with a new free safety in true freshman Lubern Figaro.
On special teams, the Badgers trotted out a true freshman kicker, who may have been the most impressive player on the field for either team—or at least his dance moves were.
Let's take a look at all 14 new starters for the Badgers with grades on their performance against LSU and a breakdown of how they've played so far this season.