Dear Abby: I have been in a relationship for two years with a man I love very much. We’re both in our early 20s. I have a house. He lives with his parents and is going to school.
Last year, after living together for a few months due to COVID, I invited him to move in with me. It took him five months to even give me an answer about whether he wanted to. It has now been eight months since he went back home to his parents. He says he “will” move in, but won’t commit to giving me a date.
I have been blown off by him for his family multiple times, and I know it’s not something that’ll ever change. I’m wondering if we’ll last, or if I should take a step back in the relationship.
Seeing Signs in Maryland
Dear Seeing Signs: If your boyfriend wanted to live with you, he wouldn’t have gone back to live with his parents. If he wanted more of your company, he wouldn’t blow you off. Unless you are a masochist, this romance with him won’t last, and you should DEFINITELY take a step back in the relationship, if not step OUT of it entirely.
Dear Abby: I am wondering how to handle finding a hair in your food or on your plate while eating at home, or even while eating at a friend’s? I try to prevent it from happening by tugging gently at my hair, pulling out the loose ones and brushing off my sleeves and shoulders before I start cooking. However, once or twice a month, my husband finds one and complains about it, sometimes loudly. Of course I don’t do it on purpose! It embarrasses me and makes me feel horrible and defensive.
Should he mention this, or let it pass? If we were at a friend’s house, I know he wouldn’t say anything, and I wouldn’t either, for fear of causing embarrassment.
Shedding in Tennessee
Dear Shedding: Finding a foreign object in one’s food — regardless of what it is, can make someone lose his or her appetite. Because it happens “regularly,” consider preventing the problem as many professional chefs do while preparing food. Wear a hairnet, a scarf or a hat while cooking. Or, perhaps your husband should prepare his own meals.
Dear Abby: We are part of a close group of six couples who have a great time together. Although our political philosophies and worldviews are different, we always have adult and stimulating discussions. The problem is, one of the couples doesn’t believe in the COVID vaccination. We’d like to have a BBQ, but only with those of us who have been vaccinated. Is there a way we can do this without hurting the feelings of that couple?
Ready to Socialize, But
Dear Ready: It depends upon whether they feel the same way regarding wearing masks and social distancing. Diplomatically discuss your concerns with this couple. It would be better than excluding them and having them find out about it later.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
